As I sit here, waiting for my next class to start, a group of deaf students are conversing in the middle of the hallway. Though not a single word is spoken, and there are few, if any, discernible sounds, I follow the ebb and flow of the conversations almost as if I spoke ASL, which I do not. It’s fascinating to me that, though the language is completely different, I can understand the expressions, the group dynamics, and even the mannerisms of the different students easily. I can’t help but watch.
I had a number of similar situations when I was living in Hong Kong when I first arrived. I may not have been able to speak or understand (most of) the language, but I could often understand the mannerisms, the dynamics, the relationships, all by watching. While many often enjoy the nature of people-watching, I personally prefer to “people-interpret”, creating my own dialogue and reasonings behind why the people I watch are doing the things that they do.
Why do the two basketball players walk slowly down the hallway, while the lone kid with a backpack can’t seem to run fast enough? Why do some people avoid the gaze of others, while others are looking all around? Are people shy? Or excited? Or cautious? What are their stories? What are their lives like? Where are they going, or coming from? What experiences do they have to share?
While that may seem a little odd, I think that it’s an important trait to have, especially for someone who is looking to pursue a career in entertainment or writing. I think that it’s important to be able to create compelling fiction from something that may even seem a little mundane.
But more than just for writing, I think it’s important to realize that each person that you see every day, no matter what they look like, what they’re doing or what they’re wearing or driving, is an individual person with an individual life. If you asked them, they would probably have a million stories to tell.
And well, so do I.
- Karratti
August 27, 2009 | Categories: Life, Social, Writing | Tags: observe, people, translate, translation, watch, Writing | Leave A Comment »
As much as I can appreciate the irony of typing words about such a subject, I still feel like there’s something to be said here. All last night, as I carved my way through the second act of my latest project, I continued to be plagued by an acute sense of writer’s block. While the layman might not understand the exact implications of that, someone to whom writing is familiar knows all-too-well that feeling that nothing is going to come, no matter how hard you stare at the blinking cursor on the screen.
It’s strange, because you know that the creativity, the passion, it’s all in there. But when it comes to bringing it out, putting it down in a concrete, readable form, it becomes jumbled, and you’re never fully satisfied that the final producct is as good as the idea that powered your imagination in the first place.
So what to do? I’ve found that, for me, one of the best things to do is just to write something else. Send some email. Write out some unrelated prose. Like a blog post, for example. Keep my mind actually thinking about writing, but blindside it with something that’s unrelated, to try and jar myself into looking at the problem from a different perspective in the hopes that something better will show itself.
I don”t know how many writers are reading this, but those of you who do can surely empathize. If you’d like to leave a comment about your ideas for removing the blocks, I’d be glad to hear them.
- Karratti
August 19, 2009 | Categories: Writing | 2 Comments »
A week or so ago, a buddy and I were talking about this series that I we’ve been working on, and we came up with a play on the phrase “Sticks and stones can break my bones, but words can never hurt me.” The rest of the night, and for a couple days afterwards, we would keep insulting each other, (jokingly, of course… ignoring the tears), and suffix the sentence with the exclamation, “Words!” It was more of an inside joke than anything else, and added yet another entry to my Idea Journal. But it was all said in fun.
Now, I know that this is sort of linked to the post I put up yesterday, but I had a situation yesterday that got me thinking a little about the profound power that words can have, even when you don’t mean them to. I was talking with another friend of mine, and the subject of relationships came up. Offhand, I asked a question that, at the time, seemed like wasn’t that big of a deal. I was pretty cavalier about it, and we didn’t dwell on it very long. It wasn’t until a couple hours later, when I got blasted by angry texts from her avenging roommate, that I realized there was more to the exchange than she had let on.
The thing is, though, I had no idea what was going on. I hadn’t been told that I’d said something offensive, or hurtful, and so I was kind of blindsided. But apparently, I had created one hell of a storm.
After we had kind of resolved the situation, I had a few hours lying in bed to think, not necessarily about what had happened, but more about the power and influence of words in general. As much as sticks and stones may hurt, words may quite possibly be a much more deadly and debilitating form of warfare. While even the deepest physical cuts can usually heal within a few months, sometimes a cutting remark can leave open wounds for years, even causing the victim to emotionally bleed out and die inside.
The adage, “The pen is mighter than the sword” is so unbelievably true that it’s scary how these weapons are carried without a license. And it’s not as if their power has never been recognized. “Knowledge is power”, and because of that, utilizing that knowledge effectively can truly be the determining factor in saving a life, or destroying one.
Wow, went a lot deeper than I meant to. I guess I just wanted to remark that you should really watch what you say. I mean, I’m pretty blunt, and I say whatever I happen to be thinking, because to me, I feel that talking about someone behind their back is just cowardly. But even so, be aware of the effects of your words. And be aware of the effects of words on you. All in all, just be aware.
And watch out for the sharp points.
- Karratti
August 18, 2009 | Categories: Social, Writing | Leave A Comment »
I know that I may be a little behind on certain social norms, and I definitely am daily more aware of my severe lack of pop-culture knowledge, but I just don’t know how I went for nearly twenty-five years of life without going to a concert. It defies logic. To think that I missed out on that kind of opportunity just boggles my mind, especially now that I’ve checked that off of my life’s to-do list for the first time.
So, a buddy of mine got a couple of free tickets to the Green Day concert in Salt Lake yesterday, and man was it awesome. We were up in the nosebleed section, and I’ll readily admit that I didn’t really recognize the first half of the songs, but the whole show was just a blast. Being able to let loose, act crazy, and have a good time was just a blast. Every song was an experience, with the lighting, pyrotechnics, the screens lighting up, and just the showmanship of the band. It was unbelievable.
Green Day, for me, links directly into my high school years, and brings back a lot of great memories. I mean, I remember Minority from when it was playing daily on the radio, and I found myself unable to resist belting it out at full bore. And then, to end with Good Riddance was brilliant, because as I’m sure was popular throughout the nation, that was my high school class’ unoffical theme song.
But the biggest thing that I pulled away from the concert was something that got me thinking. It took me a while to realize that I could really jump around and act like a crazy person, and nobody cared. It was almost expected. I was hitting the bar in front of me, dancing around, jumping, screaming… And that was perfectly alright.
I don’t know about you, but I was raised to be a pretty sober individual. I’m usually pretty mild-mannered, quiet, and pretty shy. And as I looked around the staduim, there were definitely a lot of people who weren’t dancing, who seemed to be looking around, unable to let themselves enjoy the moment of being crazy. Acting like a nut, I think, really takes some courage. You just can’t let what other people think determine who you are, and what you do. I know I’ve taken on that mantra before, but it was something that I’ve kind of forgotten.
So man up. Act like a fool, and don’t care if anyone else is looking. Your heart needs the release.
- Karratti
August 17, 2009 | Categories: Entertainment, Music | Tags: concert, courage, first, Green Day, Music | 1 Comment »
I think that every one of us, no matter how outwardly confident or independant we might seem, can feel a measure of fear. Each of us have those situations where we’re absolutely confident, and others where we’re absolutely petrified. For some, it may be something as physical as heights, or tiny creatures. For others it may be a fear of a person, or a place. For most of us, however, I believe that our fears are more psycological, or social – The fear of rejection, of failure, of heartbreak, or of the unknown.
But then again, maybe that’s just me. I was making my way home from my most recent grip job last night around six am, and I’m not sure if it was the extreme lack of sleep from a long week of late shoots, or just the sobriety that comes from a lengthy amount of driving, but I realized that there is a fear inside of me, one that I’ve been struggling to ignore for quite some time.
It’s not a fear of spiders, snakes or snails, and it’s not of heights or even of public speaking. My logical mind seems to have an innate ability to explain away why I shouldn’t be afraid of those things. But instead, I believe my fear is more commonly held among those of us who long for something that seems unreachable, a paramount challenge whose rewards are uncertain and whose fruits may not be as sweet as we believe.
I have a fear of the interpersonal.
I am, by nature, a fairly shy and private person, preferring only to disclose to those around me the things that I wish to be known. There are plenty of parts of my life that I don’t really like to share with anyone – Feelings, thoughts, stories and ideas, all of which I feel might cause others to view me as strange, criminal, perverse, or even insane. I think a key to happiness, though, lies in finding people with whom you can feel safe to share those innermost thoughts, who you can trust not to judge you by the impressions that your ideas may make, but instead accepts you for the unique individual you are.
My problem, however, isn’t exactly finding friends. I have a good number of great friends – People who I can trust, and whose loyalty I have no reason to question. People whose hands I would be perfectly comfortable putting my life into. Instead, I find myself having a hard time overcoming the fear of establishing new relationships.
It’s understandable, I think to myself. I mean, I had a break-up that was really rough on me in 2007. This girl really tore me up. But I should have been able to get over it. I should have been alright. Instead, I find myself fearful of putting my heart out there again. When your soul has been crushed like that, it’s understandable to be hesitant to allow someone else the chance to take a hammer to it, and so for me, I’ve become more and more intimidated to the idea.
I find myself wanting to overcome it, but unwilling to put in the effort. It’s as if I can’t seem to see the goal clearly enough to take the chance at obtaining it. Perhaps that’s a goal that I should take upon myself. Perhaps I just need to take a chance and try – See where it takes me. I’ve guarded my heart for two years, allowing it to become locked away, cold, and hard. I need to let myself learn to care again.
The only thing I have to fear is fear itself. Unfortunately, fear is a very formidable adversary, and requires very specific weaponry, and very specific goals to defeat it.
I just hope I’m up to the challenge.
- Karratti
August 16, 2009 | Categories: Life, Love, Social | Tags: break, fear, friends, heart, hope, Love | 1 Comment »
